Why Knowing Your Purpose Doesn't Mean You Are Ready

It can be frustrating listening to a talk or message on God’s great purpose and dream for our lives when we feel confused as to what our purpose even is. We may have a faint vision of what we want to be, but nothing in our life, not even our own skill set is ready for it yet.

Perhaps you can relate to my story.

It was hard for me to narrow down exactly what I was made for because I have skill sets and interests in several areas. I love performing in musical theatre, singing, politics, and acting. One of the reasons my dream of becoming Miss USA remained so consistent was because I could combine almost all of my interests into that job. I figured I could be Miss USA for a year and that would help me decide what I wanted to do.

When I moved to LA, I still didn’t have a clear career direction so I set my sights on TV hosting. I took hosting classes, got a hosting agent, made a reel, took film/TV classes for acting, got a theatrical manager, went on auditions, and booked a few jobs in those first few years.

I was modeling and doing commercials, which were great, but it didn’t fulfill me. The feeling of emptiness and frustration began to set in because I wasn’t operating in my purpose. I felt a bit aimless.  
In the meantime, I started pursuing a deeper relationship with God again. The more God revealed Himself to me, the more I felt the burning desire to share His love with other women.

One day, I had an “aha” moment when I saw all my life events, strengths, passions, and interests flash across my mind. And I felt a longing to inspire women in the same way God had inspired me.

God had finally revealed to me that my calling was to combine my love of performing and communicating with my love for God and women. I agreed in my heart.

Three years after being Miss USA I had figured it out, I knew my purpose! Now what?

I comprised a plan of how I was going to do this, and it started with writing through my personal blog. I sat down at the computer and readied my fingers over the keyboard. Nothing came. There was a block-- like a wall. Nothing was flowing.

I felt so discouraged and confused. I knew what my purpose was, but now I needed to do it! Why couldn’t I?

Can you relate? Do you feel like you know what you were made for, do you have that desire, but you feel like you don’t know where to begin? And even when you do, it feels like there is resistance?

Joyce Meyer, the well-known speaker and author, has had a huge impact on my life. I love how candidly she speaks, how unapologetically opinionated she is, how she operates in her ministry, and travels the world. The women who wore the Miss USA crown were my childhood role-models, and now Joyce Meyer had become my new role-model.

In my despair, I read one of her devotionals. It talked about seasons, specifically seasons of preparation. I had never heard of that before. There are seasons where we have to go “under-cover” so God can grow us, teach us, prune us, and prepare us for the next step. He loves us too much to let us launch too quickly into something we aren’t ready for.

We may think we are ready, but God knows best. Of course, we will never fully “arrive” until the day we meet Jesus, but there are certain things that needs to be in place before God graduates us from the training ground.

God says that He will “hide us in the shadow of His wings” to protect us. He may be hiding you right now, just like a flower hides in the winter for protection so it can bloom again in the spring.

It is crucial for our success and well-being to understand there are different seasons we go through. The book of Ecclesiastes says there is a “time for everything under the sun.” You may be in a season of preparation right now. If not, there will be a time that you go into one.

God couldn’t launch me into speaking and writing in His name until my character was refined to match the task. I still had a lot of preparing to do, not only on my character, but in my knowledge and understanding of the Bible.

God took me into a long season of studying the Word, journaling, reading Christian books, and doing Bible studies with wiser women.

In what ways do you need to grow? What things can you do now to prepare you for what you want to step into later?

As a daughter of the King, you have the desire for meaning and purpose. You were made for it. You may get down on yourself because you don’t feel the peace to move on it yet, but that is because you are probably in a season of preparation. Give yourself grace and be willing to open your eyes to see the areas in your life God wants to grow you.

Once I read that devotion, it gave me permission to relax and rest in that season of preparation.  Finally one day as I was praying, I felt Him lift the block and say, “GO.” I raced to my laptop and logged in to my blog account and began writing. My sense was right. The words freely flowed from my mind through my fingertips and onto the computer screen. He had released me into the next step of my purpose!

Since then, there have definitely been seasons when He brings me back to be quiet and still again to work out a roadblock or challenge. It can be discouraging, but now that I understand seasons, I’m able to release the need to control or steam ahead. I know that I need my spiritual thirst quenched like the flowers during April showers, or go into rest like some animals in the winter.

Be aware of what season you are in and give yourself the grace to be there. Pay attention to what God wants to do, and partner with Him in it. The more in tune you are with how God works, and what He is doing, the more quickly you will be able to get in step with Him in peace.

Kristen Dalton

Kristen Dalton Wolfe is a former Miss USA turned Mrs. Wolfe. Since then, Kristen has used her passion for women and background in Psychology to launch SheisMore.com. Kristen and her husband, Kris Wolfe, founder of GoodGuySwag.com are based in Los Angeles and speak regularly. Kristen is also the author of Rise Up, Princess: 60 Days To Revealing Her Royal Identity and Rise Up With God: The Guided Journal.

Join the discussion

Anjelica April 21, 2017 at 2:36pm

Thank you so much for this. I have written and shared with others for many years but last year I felt the need to stop for a while. I started exploring my creativity like art and photography again. And I have felt like I have so much energy and I am full of life due to Gods grace, but I can't sit there and write like I used too. I have felt in my soul "not yet" and that "not yet" actually leaves me feeling peaceful like I can breathe! It's my mind at times that tricks me into thinking everything has to be NOW! This article has refreshed me on many levels and reassured that voice within that it's fine to rest in this season. Thank you so much. You ALWAYS writes so clearly and your words are timely too.

Emmalisa Tilli November 17, 2016 at 5:40pm

This is absolutely FANTASTIC!!!!!! I must say I went through a Dark Period of my life where I thought I wasn't normal, uneducated, and unintellectual. I thought I wasn't a "lady" - now I have a blog called "Exquisite Emmalisa" and I have a friend that says "you can see the excitement in your words" and another lady said "I was never too short of words" - that perplexed me because I thought I was a woman without a brain - that was a lie - and God pulled me through, and I felt excited about life, that I have been wanting to do more and more with my life - get involved in whatever community God leads me to and fulfil my purpose on this earth. I have a yearning desire to reach out to young girls, and long for education - that I am thinking after library studies of doing THREE university degrees. I thought I couldn't do it - I even mentioned my thoughts on my blog, but I have a passion for certain things and want to follow through.

Thanks so much for such a wonderful post - a friend sent it to me via Facebook, and it was just so timely for me.

I also want to read the "princess" book!!! I am intrigued!!! and want to read the whole thing!!!!!

Thanks again

Amy July 17, 2016 at 1:44am

Thank you!! I so needed these words this morning and during this season which feels like both intense preparation, waiting and needing to take action in some areas...perhaps on the surface contradictory but often it's not a discrete either/or. Often times I believe God allows both to happen simultaneously in order to accomplish full preparation, and your words are such an encouragement because I feel the burn to help women heal and use the power of their pasts; to share so many messages of hope God is giving me. Thankfully I have an opportunity to do that as a psychotherapist and life coach, and I know one day (hopefully soon) I will be publishing and speaking to reach a wider audience for Him. Thank you for your example and witness!

Ginny May 7, 2016 at 12:34am

Kristen, thank you for your beautiful words! The Lord has led me to a season of preparation. Your words have encouraged me to remain patient and to wait upon the Lord "undercover in the shadow of His wings".

Kim April 13, 2016 at 3:48am

Thank you for this! I feel God moving me to write but every time I sit down with my computer it is blank. It is encouraging to know that someone has been there. That there are seasons of life and to be reminded of that. I am being prepared for something I just don't know what!

Cc April 10, 2016 at 4:43am

Truly this article was God inspired. Im in that season lf preparation right now but had never seen it in that perspective. Im studying God's word being obedient and. I had been wondering whats next for a while. Living the simple life of just serving God. But this article has allowed me to see things in a whole different perspective. Thank you!

Vanessa April 8, 2016 at 12:09am

Thank you so much for sharing this article! I have recently launched my ministry, and I find myself asking "Now what?" After reading this, I will go back and make sure that I've completed the preparation stage, then allow God to reveal my next move when I'm ready.

Jill April 5, 2016 at 2:02am

I feel like God is using you to speak directly into my heart right now. I was recently laid off from a 'safe' job that had nothing to do with my calling. It would be so easy to jump into what I believe my purpose is and become frustrated and angry when God doesn't show up. I'm resting in these words today knowing that God will be the one to open those doors.

Cynthia Chinazor April 4, 2016 at 6:15pm

Nice post that I totally relate with. If only "discover-your-purpose" speakers also explained the waiting and preparatory stage to people....Thank you for this post

Patti Benson April 3, 2016 at 2:54pm

Thank you Kristin. I too, think Joyce Meyer is amazing and have read about the "seasons." Your article is a great reminder, though. I ask God every day where would He have me serve Him; what did He create me to do; and I ask Him to lead me. So, I will be still and listen, prepare and wait. Blessings.

Lisa Elaine April 3, 2016 at 10:49am

This is very timely. I enjoyed reading this and I am so grateful that God cares so much about us that He prunes and refines, leads us and gets us to be still. What a loving Father our Lord is. I trust His timing and I trust the process completely. I don't want to jump ahead of Him because navigating through the many personalities in ministry can be tricky if I am not prepared.

Jeanette April 3, 2016 at 2:52am

So good... This spoke volumes to me especially the part about our character matching up with the purpose He has for us. That's why seasons of preparation are necessary. I'm grateful for your inspiration

Jacinta Wallace April 3, 2016 at 1:54am

I'm so very thankful to have read this article thank you for sharing your story I'm inspired and encouraged

Jennifer Millington April 3, 2016 at 12:42am

Perfect timing. I know I have a passion to help abused women and struggle to open the right doors top help. I also understand i'm not ready yet. Back to the Bible I go xxxxx

kristanti March 31, 2016 at 3:28am

pls let me know how to find purpose in life when you dont know what is your talent. i prayed but still no answer

Jess March 30, 2016 at 6:18am

You have really spoken to my heart.
Am in this situation right now.